Bridlepath Cottage Review: Murder, Mist and Massages in West Berkshire

You didn’t want to be caught having an affair in Berkshire at any time in the 17th century. Worse still, you didn’t want to be caught murdering your spouse and child so you could carry on your clandestine liaison unencumbered by the mere fact of being married. Unfortunately, that is exactly what sealed the fate of lovers George Bromham and Dorothy Newman, who were tried for murder in 1679 and hanged at Winchester. Accounts of how they dispatched their victims range from George’s wife’s head being rammed into a hornets’ nest to both being beaten to death with staves. Whatever the method, the perpetrators’ bodies were then strung up on Combe Gibbet as a warning to others not to attempt such an egregious crime.

It is to the gibbet (its fifth incarnation since the original) that we have clambered up Gallows Down from our far more salubrious base, Bridlepath Cottage in Inkpen, where we are nestled for an autumn weekend away from the Big Smoke. Despite the ghoulish history, the view around the 25ft-high post is magnificent. On a clear day, it is said, you can see five counties – Berkshire, Buckinghamshire, Oxfordshire, Hampshire and Gloucestershire. For us, though, the valley is shrouded in dramatic autumn mist, swirling below us over woody copses and fertile farmland.

Continuing our walk, we head down past the Grade II-listed Kirby House, set in 2,000 acres and available for private hire, before wending our way along Sunday-quiet lanes to the village pub, the Crown & Garter, for a much-deserved glass of something strong and a bowl of chips with mayonnaise (a perfect Sunday lunch in my book). The village’s only pub also has rooms, plus a separate café and a very small shop (good for dog food and high-priced chocolate, as far as I can see).

With the weak sun already beginning its descent, we pull our boots back on and head back to our warm, cosy cottage, where the underfloor heating has kept things toasty in our absence. Set back from the main road, with its own drive and gravelled parking, Bridlepath Cottage has four double bedrooms (two en suite) and is beautifully designed without being overdone. A highlight is the Fanny Shorter Mill Oak wallpaper that covers the upstairs hallway. It is the perfect hideaway for a weekend of walks, wine and chat, and Inkpen is blessed with miles of footpaths, so you don’t need to get in the car to find a decent hike.

I’ve brought my two best friends with me, both of whom deserve rest and relaxation more than most. One is a deputy head at a London state primary, the other a counsellor. Their weeks in the city are intense, and we snatch only the occasional evening of gossip in busy London bars. Now we have two whole days to catch up properly.

We like a good location (not so far away that we’re beset by terrible travel times), plenty of sleep and time carved out for reading by the fire. This weekend we’ve topped it all off with massages for the three of us at the cottage, which Luxury Cottages can easily arrange, as it can a private chef.

Bridlepath Cottage is brilliantly located. Inkpen is a seven-minute drive from Kintbury station, which sits on the Kennet & Avon Canal (wonderful for walking, too) and is itself a seven-minute train ride from Newbury. The drive from West London takes just over an hour, but the setting couldn’t feel more rural.

In the evenings, silence drenches everything but the call of a tawny owl, and blackness takes over the sky. After our baths and massages, we light the log burner and sink into squidgy sofas with glasses of champagne. It is just past five but, quite frankly, who’s clock-watching? Things just happen earlier in the country, and we slide happily into bed by ten.

Come morning, the mist is knee-deep again. We wander down the lanes, spying some wonderful houses, before returning for coffee with frothy milk. It all feels very English: a pretty village, lovely lanes, farmland, dog walkers and the crunch of autumn leaves. Just perfect.

Book it: Bridlepath Cottage is available through Luxury Cottages from £211 per night.